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Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Flashback Friday wherein you should actually flash back TO Friday and pretend you were reading this post. Because today is Tuesday, dudes.

Due to renewing some old friendships on the ultimate timesuck Facebook, I've been thinking about college lately. It was a time to discover myself - to look introspectively and determine my strong suits, my potential, my skills. To put it simply - it's when I really learned to answer the question, "What do you want to be when you grow up?"

Within a few weeks of my freshman year, I knew definitively what I wanted to be.

A frat boy.

Who has a better life than a frat boy? I offer for your consideration: They get to hang out with other dudes. If they want the company of females, they post a flyer and boom - girls are there. But if they want to lock the door and watch sports, it's all good in the name of brotherhood. Speaking of their doors, they're usually attached to a pretty nice piece of architecture. Except for the Pi Kappa Alpha house on Colorado State University's campus (ie: "The White House" because really, it was a shack and all it had going for it was a new coat of paint) MOST fraternity houses are beautiful old homes. Sure, they smell on the inside, but the columns and sweeping porches and grand entrances totally make up for beer-soaked carpets behind those doors. Oh - and beer? There's always beer. I'm a fan of beer. Besides used kegs on those porches, there's often really comfortable furniture. And not patio furniture that just looks comfortable, either. Real, live, inside couches outside on the porch. That's not just a good idea, that's living, my friends.

Alas however, I couldn't figure out how to actually join a fraternity...so I just hung out on the fringes of them, wearing my converse lowtops, cargo shorts and aviator sunglasses, holding a red party cup and trying to blend in. One particular SAE intrigued me. Besides having really great bangs, he owned a Honda Interceptor - one of the best crotch rockets of the 80s. Did he keep it polished and shiny to impress everyone? Nope. It was covered with stickers and decals and a couple of dents in the gas tank. Because that's how he rolled, man. Everyone recognized this guy - most people hated him. I wanted to be him. Or at least get my hands on that bike.

Or one just like it. Only better.  Today, I present you with a delicious retro example of my extreme badassery, and the culmination of my frat boy ambitions.




Behold, a 1992 Little Girl Big Glasses - complete with windblown pageboy permed hair, mock turtleneck sleeveless striped tee, pleated shorts, leather Keds...and my rockin' pink and blue crotch rocket. At the time, I was working my first real job, making tens of dollars a month. I realized that after making the $155 payment on my Toyota Tercel and the $249 rent payment, there was money left over...and since food was optional, I had the perfect amount to finance a 1990 Honda VTR 250, the 'baby' Interceptor. I paid 11% interest on an RV loan to buy it and it was worth EVERY penny. Frat boys had nothin' on me. Except maybe better bangs.

8 comments:

  1. That rocks! I loved the frat life too! I was in a sorority (Alpha Phi) and got "tapped" as a little sister at the ATO house my freshman year. It was all very formal, with the President of the Frat serenading me and handing me one red rose on the steps of the A-phi house as all my sisters in their matching gowns wept. He took my hand and led me down the street by candlelight...and then it was ON! Toga! Toga! Toga! ha ha ha ha
    Talk about a one way ticket to academic probation! I was one "Around the World " party away from getting kicked out half the time before I wised up!

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  2. Dude? You need to sit down before you read this comment. I kinda have chills (but I might also be getting the flu). Okay, first of all, my dad has owned a Honda motorcycle dealership since 1967. Garvis Honda. He's the only Honda motorcycle dealer in Des Moines. Secondly, I learned how to ride at a very early age and spent weekends on everything from three wheelers to dirt bikes to whatever the hell else my dad had around. Third, I worked at my dad's dealership from 1988 to 1990 (during my hiatus from college. I went back to college shortly after this and completed my degree). Anyway, when I was working for my dad I became very attached to a certain VTR250 but mine was the dark one with the hot pink, aqua blue, and purple. My dad let me have it as my demo and I rode all over the place on it. Total dude magnet (as I'm sure you know). So, how weird is this coincidence? I mean, are you kinda freaked out by our continued long-lost twinness???? I mean THIS IS SO COOL!!!!

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  3. Tracey. Holy crap, dude. Totally have chills. ALSO? We are SO COOL! Do you think your dad could hook us up some VTRs? They're hard to find now...tell him I'm his long-lost daughter. He'll remember me. I sold mine to a very short male nurse and have regretted it ever since. We totally have to ride baby crotch rockets to Sturgis, man!

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  4. I never thought of that... you're a genius. You're right, being a frat boy has to be AWESOME.

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  5. I KNOW! We are the coolest girls ever! When I read your post I was like "Wow, that is the frekiest coincidence yet!" I mean, we were already long lost twins and now this! I will have to ask my dad to keep an eye out for a little baby VTR. If he ever gets an old one in on trade I will go to the dealership, sit on the motorcycle, and have my dad take a picture of me on it. For old time's sake, ya know. Then I will ride it to Colorado, pick you up, and we'll cruise frat boys on it. Sigh.....

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  6. As I was reading this I was totally thinking of Tracey. You two are way too funny... and of course... cool.

    Have you thought about co-authoring a book? Your posts back and forth are hilarious.

    I never went to college unless you consider all those parties I attended. So I guess you could say I attended college on weekends only.

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  7. I'll ride with you only if you don't mind me riding a Harley. :P

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